じゅうにばんめにわるいゆめのさち (2024)

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"じゅうにばんめにわるいゆめのさち" (Junibanme wo Bad Yume no Sachi) is one of literally thousands of retro 2D platformers infesting Steam and lowering the average quality of all video games everywhere... and I'm not kidding. Searching for "platformers" on the Steam store page yields over 17,000 results! Is this one of the best of those? Absolutely not. This is a hybrid "falling object" platformer. The idea is that you arrange falling objects into a "hill" you can climb to traverse to help the girl catching sheep in her dreams. It's on par/slightly worse than 1990's Flash games. This was published just last year, however, and not in 1999. Platforming is an old, mostly dead genre, and this lacklustre experience, while it doesn't have an upfront cost, isn't saving the genre... it's no surprise this failed to capture any attention from gamers in the era of immersive 3D gaming. There's no English translation for the game, but that's okay. The language of bad games is universal. The game is really simple and unambitious in terms of implementation, more of a tech demo or one of those cases where an amateur developer spends $100 to publish something on Steam Direct to see if it's possible. Ye…