The Longest Road on Earth

This is.............tough to review. Look, what if I told you that there was a piece of media designed to convey the tedium/monotony of the daily grind, from a variety of perspectives. In order for it to be successful, it would have to illustrate how boring and soul-crushing some of the routines of life can be. The problem is (naturally!) that that means the game itself must be pretty damned tedious itself. Which isn't fun. At all! So, the positives are the graphics; truly next level pixel-based graphics. Really good stuff! The negatives are the absolutely tedious gameplay, bogging you down doing banal, unskippable things like sitting on a bus/subway and watching the walls of the tunnels etc, fly past you......for several bloody minutes! And it's unskippable. And it's made worse by (completely subjective opinion coming up) some absolutely atrocious folk/pop music that likewise cannot be skipped, just fingernails on the blackboard level of misery made into musical format. The sort of barely present, breathy, whispery almost not real singing singing, like open mic night at some hipster coffee shop where the local waitress thinks she's got talent and Marilyn Monroe …

Well. I usually don't cry. And i usually don't review games. But this, for sure is not a usual videogame. I would argue that this is also NOT a video game, but this is about definitions. Now if you want a game, that's not it. But if you want to experience a story, a long one, you are in the right place. It is a story, it is an interactive movie, that you get to watch while pressing one or in the best case two buttons on your screen. The story follows four characters, four main plots and you get to experience them one by one. Also, as every movie, it heavily relies on the music and the art-style (fantastic pixel-art) So if you want to experience it, check that you vibe with the music and the art. And then sit back, and enjoy every minute of it :,)

At this point im convinced that the Brainwash Gang wanted to make movies/animation, not games. But making movies is expensive and they settled for gamedev. Their visuals and music are great, gameplay is boring or tedious. Longest Road on Earth plays exactly as the name sounds - long holding of Left/Right, spamming space (sometimes even holding space!), that's it. The most exciting part about the game was cool 3d looking animations of a fridge opening, 10 dollar bill, ROTATED BUILDING, CAR and flying birds. Instead of playing the game, just buy the soundtrack. Music is by far the best part of the game.

Essentially an interactive music album. You might cry (positive).

Soothing.

:steamhappy::steamsad: