Dungeons & Geese

[h1]Flawed indie platformer with a bizarre but oddly consistent storyline[/h1] I cannot in good faith [i]recommend[/i] [b]Dungeons & Geese[/b] - it is a buggy, clumsy platformer that just screams mediocrity. However, it surprisingly has some things going for it that may make this a mixed review instead. I will keep this spoiler-lite regardless. [h1]Set the stage[/h1] An old, rich, and (surprisingly relevant storywise) gay drunkard wakes up in a basement after a party, having lost their memory, and has to fight rats by throwing "pink spears" (dildos) at them. It's just a tad mindblowing as it's ludicrous. It's amazing that someone came up with this and made it into a mostly consistent plot. Once you get out, there's visual novel / old-timey RPG sort of dialogues to enjoy, including one or two dialogue puzzles. [h1]So bad![/h1] [i]Dungeons & Geese[/i] is not exactly a masterpiece. It's got numerous flaws: [b]Unbindable keys and clumsy controls:[/b] - WASD for moving, 'W' for jumping, 'S' for [i]falling faster[/i], mouse for shooting and activating special items, and finally 'Q' for interacting (when an indicator for it shows up). - Typical of indie platformers (I know, I hav…

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Dungeons & Geese is yet another of literally thousands of 2D retro pixel platformers infesting Steam and lowering the average quality of all video games everywhere. This shovelware platformer seems to be sincerely made, just badly made. It's not an asset flip either, which is something. There's a weird joke theme about the game where you control some Russian/Victorian era guy and jump through a comedy dungeon. Whatever satire or joke they were going for falls flat, and the gameplay is even worse than the premise. From a technical perspective, the game doesn't meet basic minimum requirements that most PC gamers expect as standard. The artwork here is terrible, it's a blend of old retro pixel "art" used as a substitute for contemporary PC graphics, and some of the most amateurish MS-Paint style drawings (I won't deign to call these "illustrations"). It's unclear if this is due to lack of budget to arrange someone who can do graphics properly, or lack of talent, regardless, the overall visual quality of the game is extremely low as a result of these decisions. There's no options to change the resolution for the game or customise the graphics settings. There's no way for gamer…

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Truly a spectacular assortment of a game, words dont even have the strength to invoke the sort of feelings this game enchanted me with. If a game were to ever match this games level of brilliance, I would think I would be playing a game designed by a choir of Angels. To even call this a game feels like shooting myself in the chest, it’s much much more than can be described as a game. Without this game, I don’t think I would be the same person I am today. It’s every line of dialogue cuts deep as a knife into my heart, it all amounts to a subtleness I can’t describe! -A truely devoted fan in the dungeons and geese fandom.

Dungeons & Geese, developed and published by the Bratans, is a small-scale 2D action-platformer that blends exploration, light combat, and surreal storytelling into a distinctly offbeat experience. Released as a budget indie title, it carries the rough edges and experimental ambition often associated with solo or micro-team projects. Rather than relying on mainstream conventions or polished cinematic presentation, it embraces a quirky identity built around atmosphere, unusual character design, and a strange narrative hook. The story places players in control of an elderly protagonist whose quiet life has been disrupted by sudden misfortune. Driven by desperation and curiosity, he ventures into unfamiliar territory in pursuit of a rare and valuable resource. The Victorian-inspired setting gives the game a distinctive tone, with dim interiors, old churches, and period-style architecture shaping the backdrop. While the narrative unfolds in fragments rather than fully fleshed-out cutscenes, it contributes to an overall sense of melancholy and oddity. Dialogue and encounters feel deliberately eccentric, reinforcing the game’s slightly surreal character. Gameplay revolves around tradit…