Death Pirate

Possibly the worst side-scroller I have ever played. Shameful that such a shoddy, bug ridden, ham fisted program should be released on Steam as a finished product. No options to adjust the music or sound, selecting 'back to menu' crashes the game. The first chapter has you literally clicking through text. No attempt at gameplay at all. Give me one day and a programming for beginners book and I could knock something up more fun that this. Hmmm that gives me an idea, WTF am I doing wasting time writing this review.

Game is alright, but not that special. Its hard, death will come, many, many.. many times. But you still get cash even when you die, so it won't be for nothing. I like the music and feeling of destruction you make, especially when you level up a bit and go into lower zones. Leveling up your char, and upgrading your abilities with special coins, which.. I still have to find out how to get. I didn't like the dialogues to much, there is some humor in it. But it couldn't really keep my attention. Action feels a bit clumsy and the characters are unbalanced. An additional note is that you can't play on fullscreen (although it still fills up until your taskbar). So is it a taker? That's up to you, the price ain't that high. And if your into this sort of games, there is plenty of hours of gameplay to put in. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oVa3ZZRTezA

Don't buy this game, please. I launched it, couldnt open settings, everytime I tried to go to button configuration the game freaked out and brought me back to the home screen, the "back to main menu" button crashes the game. But, easily the worst thing about this game is that it doesnt work. When you click on a level it brings you into a loading screen where there is an animated icon in the top right corner where a finger is repetedly pushing a button, i pressed every button on my keyboard and i could never get past the ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ LOADING SCREEN, the closest i could get is that "p" for some mother ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ reason PAUSES THE LOADING SCREEN, useful right? I know you have to press something to get by this loading screen because i got past the first loading screen by smashing my keyboard until it worked, also game play wise this game also sucks. It tries to throw this god awful, cringe inducing convoluted story at you that has nothing to do with what you're doing in game; but thats another story. This game is amateur AT BEST, and thats being extremely generous of me. DO NOT BUY.

I... don't really know what to say about Heavy Metal Death Pirate. Some parts of it, like the story and art, seem as though they had a lot of effort put into them, if perhaps not that much skill. Likewise, it seems as though the developer may have dealt with some downright shadiness when it came to how Desura/IndieRoyale treated him. (as seen on his blog: http://singestudio.blogspot.fr/2015/08/final-comments.html ) On the other hand, the result is just a pile of crap that feels in many places as though the author had never played a side-scrolling shooter before, with wonky and giant hitboxes, a forced position in the middle of the screen that doesn't give you much time to react to enemies once you see them, enemies that are obscured by the distracting backgrounds, background objects that position themselves in front of enemies, controls that are never really explained, and long missions that you have to restart from the beginning if you die. The first "side story" is supposed to be a tutorial, but there doesn't seem to be any way to complete it or even get beyond the first screen, as the tutorial guy never continues talking after his first line. So yeah. I hope the author doesn't…

Ok! on fullscreen (Alt + Enter)

What is this game and how do I play it??? The dialogue was about 15 minutes at the start (I skipped it and it was still long). I wouldn't mind if it was actually intresting. I would reccomend this if more effort went into this but this is like a school project.