Sprite Hunter

Before going into this game I was adequately horny. 75 minutes in and I'm as dry as my wife when we try to do the devil's tango (if you catch my drift ...). At the beginning everything was smooth sailing. But then the bosses (really hot btw) became almost impossible to beat. At my age (56 yrs) my reaction time simply can't hold up with modern gaming. And playing the game with one hand (wink wink) makes it almost impossible. But I can't be too negative. I really like the in depth lore. Similar to hidden gem Dark Souls it doesn't outright tell you its story. In fact it skips the entire thing which is honestly quite a novel way of storytelling. I overall didn't like this game as much as I had hoped for and I only checked it out, because my friend Bradley gifted it to me. But it didn't reignite my youthful lust as much as he assured me it would. At the end of the day it was only good for a quick jerk but not much else. Arthur out ;)

This game is so difficult! I can't get past level 2. Can you make an easier mode?

Not bad.

Quick Time Event: The Game. The enemy is invulnerable unless you use the correct move. The correct move is counter-intuitive and also not what the tutorial text says. What would you normally use to break through a block? Heavy hit, right? In this game you have to use light hit. The solution is to not play the way the devs intended. Simply run past the regular enemies. They do not chase you. Once you locate the boss, web them, hit them and run away. Repeat that 20-30 times and you've won. The walk and run animations are horrid (robotic) but the ones you get when webbing enemies are nice. A shame you can't enjoy them becaue they recover quickly and the camera is too high and fixed. The torture section was a big disappointment. I've unlocked the second torture type - tickling - but it's no better than the basic whipping post one. To add insult to injury, the same laughing sound plays whether you gag the torturee or not. The best thing I can say about the game is that it works. Take my advice and don't shop for games when you are horny.

This game is so buggy and poorly designed that it makes it legitimately unplayable. I'm red/green colored blind and I have to do what is essentially a QTE game with red/green/white colors as the main combat direction. It got to the point to where I said "screw it." and begun just dodge spamming attacks until I got a guard I can go in to attack with. Well, let's just say the game doesn't work remotely close to what is advertised in the initial video where you can easily combo into near infinite attacks at will. The amount of invulnerability frames enemies have is absurd. Coupled with having to discern within a half a second period which one of 3 actions I must take to counter and when I do get it right, I try to do the infinites that are shown in the video and it's not actually possible. Either due to frame pacing or just flat out poor design. But I'm more keen to say it's an issue with both. The enemy just recovers too fast or the iframes activate too quickly. Not being able to progress just by running away from every enemy is toxic as well. Needing to take out every enemy you come across with the most tedious and poorly designed combat system just to be allowed to go to the nex…