ZAKO NO AHIRU

didnt like it (mary is cute)

90 minutes in, and I've been in an endless loop of Stage 1 and 2. Is this hell? But the cute brat keeps me going, so I suppose I just need to take a break before going back in again~ 10/10

‎It is an infuriating climbing precision platformer developed by Fukuoka Fighters and published by Phoenixx Inc. on Steam. ‎ ‎Think of this an actual test in godly-tier patience as a highly economical alternative to actual therapy. For the price of a cheap coffee, you get to simulate the ultimate existential crisis by controlling a water-squirting rubber ducky defying gravity, instead of paying a life coach to lie to you. ‎ ‎Mary Sugaki will provide 1,000 expertly voiced, brutally honest insults to roast your terrible hand-eye coordination. It is a masterclass in psychological resilience. ‎Buy it because suffering in a beautiful, chaotic physics sandbox builds character—and watching a virtual girl mock your pathetic pixelated falls is cheaper than hiring a personal dominatrix. ‎山田じぇみ子さん、お疲れ様でした! ‎ ‎It is a certified rage-inducer that can absolutely shatter your mental fortitude and endanger your gaming hardware in minutes. ‎The game is weaponized psychological warfare designed to trigger immediate, explosive anger through a few specific mechanics. ‎But, unless you're a gamer with a pure patiently heart of an angelic being, then this game isn't made for you. At all. ‎ ‎If you lac…

Brat....

Terrible alisasing on a low framerate masked as pixel graphics. The latter wouldn't hurt my eyes this bad, and a physical pain isn't the right mood to play this game.

As a disclaimer upfront, I didn't complete this game, so you can judge me for that and dismiss my review if you want. This game is pretty charming. The artstyle is very bright and cheery, the soundtrack is happy and upbeat, and the general gameplay style is really cool. You play as a little duck that needs to navigate a blocky landscape. You do so by spewing water from your mouth to launch yourself. You can do it multiple times in the air. It's Getting Over it but with multi-jumping and bouncy physics. This gameplay style? Pretty fun. When it's working properly. The direction of your jump is indicated by an arrow pointing in the direction you will launch. One thing about that arrow - it lies, IT LIES!! The whole mesugaki thing genuinely didn't influence me at all, but what I DID find myself yelling at was the game itself actively showing me about to jump in a direction, and then when I press the button, it goes in a different direction. I don't know if it's some weird bug with the physics engine or whatever, but it really kills your whole flow when what FEELS like a bug is the reason for your downfall (literally downfall). There's also the weird water storage mechanic that…