

Guards vs Goats
David Amado · 2026 · Swordplay, Stealth, Medieval, First-Person, Indie
PC
1 user reviews100% · 1
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About Guards vs Goats
In a long forgotten kingdom, a hero is sent to rescue a princess from an evil lord's castle.What can go wrong?Guards vs Goats is a linear, first-person-shooter with swords.It has stealth, it has action, it is story driven and... a bit silly. Just a bit...Four different melee combat modes to choose from: 10 chapters of story driven gameplay, spanning in 6 different locations. Aside from the main story, you'll have the ability to play custom chapters according to the following: Items you find in story mode, such as gold and arrows, will be used in custom chapters.
The Story
Once upon a time, in a forgotten land, in a forgotten era, there was a kingdom.The kingdom was living in peace and prosperity. A peace and prosperity which made the lords of the realm bored and greedy.When blood and war against neighboring kingdoms was lacking in their daily lives, the lords decided to fight among themselves.Times like these called for a hero. A different kind of a hero...You play as William, also know as a mercenary who goes by the name "Goat".William is not the strongest, sharpest, bravest of all, but he gets the job done. The problem is: he may cause a bigger mess while at it.The story begins with William being summoned to rescue a princess from an evil lord's castle. But for William, things will not go as smoothly as he planned.Main Features
- First person, linear, half action, half stealth playthrough.
- Dynamic game pace in the story playthrough, consisting of different modes:
- A slower paced dungeon crawling mode, where you explore castles and dungeons while choosing to use stealth or strength to progress through the level.
- A fast paced horde mode where you fight your way out.
- Boss fights.
- Escape scenarios where fighting is futile and you just need to run away as fast as you can.
- Good old hack & slash, where every strike is a hit, but damage varies.
- Timing based combat, where you or your enemy can fully block attacks if timed correctly.
- Timed + Directional combat, where in addition to perfect timing, you'll need to strike and block in the correct direction based on your opponent's action.
- A challenging, yet very fun mixture between hack & slash and timed combat.
- Each completed castle, or castle section will be unlocked to be playable in the custom chapters.
- Some of the characters you meet in the story will be selectable in the custom chapters. Characters such as princesses to rescue, sidekicks to join your side and lords to have one on one duels against.
- Different mission types to select from:
- Rescue the princess: A selected princess and the key to her will be spawned in random locations. Find the key, find the princess, get her out.
- Survive an ambush: Hordes of enemies will attack all at once. Face them alone or with a sidekick.
- Duel: Have a one on one duel with a selected character.
- More mission types might be added in the future. Please make sure to check out the News section in the community hub for update notes.
Demo
Demo available!Please give chapter 1 a try.What Steam players say
Recent verbatim reviews from Steam — separate from playze.io community reviews below.
What a fun game this is! It's simple and direct, game play is widely adustable (can be easy enough that low-skilled gamers like myself aren't overwhelmed, can be ramped up to be very challenging). The characters are well thought out, witty, and engaging, the action is exciting, and the environments are very cool. Plus, being able to interact with objects in the environment makes for a refreshing new level of combat - like a James Bond film-style fight where the stuff around you can be used as weapons! Never seen this in any other game anywhere, and it absolutely rocks. Play Guards vs Goats. It's a blast. (Full disclosure: I did provide voice acting for the game, and the author/publisher provided me a copy of the game as a way of saying thank you. I was prepared to buy it, and appreciate the gift)3 found this helpful
A fun lil knight game, classic tropes like saving the princess, stealing money and so on, with a good bit of comedy thrown into it, a pretty fun time at then end of it, my biggest crituiqe ig would be that it couldve gone a little harder of more into the comedy or a bit more, but thats about it. Fun knighting with yu Goat!2 found this helpful
Guards vs Goats is a strange but surprisingly entertaining indie medieval adventure that mixes first-person melee combat, stealth gameplay, exploration, and absurd humor into a package that constantly feels unpredictable. Developed and published by David Amado, the game follows a mercenary named William, also known as “Goat,” who becomes involved in a chaotic mission centered around rescuing a kidnapped princess from a dangerous castle. While the setup initially sounds like a fairly traditional fantasy story, the game quickly reveals itself to be something far more bizarre and comedic. Instead of taking itself seriously, Guards vs Goats embraces awkward humor, over-the-top situations, and experimental gameplay ideas that make the overall experience feel far more memorable than its unusual title might suggest. The gameplay combines multiple mechanics that constantly shift the pacing from one moment to the next. Some sections focus heavily on melee combat where players fight guards and enemies using swords and other medieval weapons, while other areas encourage stealth and careful exploration through dark corridors and castle interiors. The game often rewards players for paying atte…1 found this helpful
This game is absolute gold. once you get over the silly animations the game is pure fun. I laughed out loud so many times, throwing stuff on guards or finding silly jokes. Beyond the humor, the story has a surprising amount of depth and i didn't find any bugs of performance issues. Once I started all i wanted to do is play this game. I totally recommend!1 found this helpful
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