Lighthouse Simulator

[i]Lighthouse Simulator[/i] - the ultimate tool for those who should be doing something else! Why settle for boring fireplace and aquarium screensavers when you can admire a majestic lighthouse on a tiny rocky island instead? Adjust the weather and swell at any time, choosing between the gentle breeze that accompanies you as you tidy up or do the dishes, or the wild storm that reminds you of your unanswered mails. As the hours pass and day and night alternate, complete relaxation unfolds in your body and mind. After all, who needs sleep or rest when the mesmerizing effect of a virtual lighthouse ensnares the senses? Zooming in is not possible, instead you can scroll freely around the lighthouse while wondering why you stopped cleaning the house. After ten days, your digital girlfriend arrives on the island. At the foot of the lighthouse, she opens up a new dimension of love that silences even the ocean waves. Nevertheless, this unexpected twist makes [i]Lighthouse Simulator[/i] seem a bit like a confused sailor in search of his compass: A short animated sex clip is shown before the game continues endlessly without the flame of passion blazing once more. This program will make yo…

How to play: Don't play Review Game starts with a bizarre unskippable intro with a dreadful repeating background music loop, each loop is just seven seconds long (can be heard in the video clip on the image viewer above). Imagine this seven second loop repeating for five to ten minutes while you read a poorly written script; which has several coding errors within. In this script your long-suffering girlfriend insists you take a job on a haunted lighthouse for a TV show, and have to stay for ten days. Apparently the only winner to date was so traumatised that they committed suicide (and yet this TV show is still on the air). Anyway, you don't have any options, you take the job, and here's the good news.... the music loop ends. You are now in the simulation. You can change the settings (sound/video/environmental) by accessing the menu using the ESC key. There isn't a master volume, so you have to amend the three individual sliders separately. The good news is this takes a few moments, and whilst doing so it distracts you from the rest of the game. In the environmental controls you can make the waves bigger, the wind stronger, or choose one of several preset weathers (cloudy1, …