HOLY COW! Milking Simulator
Space Boat Studios · 2021 · Arcade, Shoot 'Em Up, Action, Bullet Hell, Difficult
PC
Positive91% · 11
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About HOLY COW! Milking Simulator
In HOLY COW! you need to lead a journey of an absolutely extraordinary cow who not only needs to survive in this cruel world of meat eaters but also wants to produce and collect the biggest possible amount of milk, no matter if the grass field is on the ground, ocean bottom or inside whale's stomach! ..at the same time trying hard to avoid any love stories.
Choose between campaign, championships or player-made scenarios to beat every possible enemy wave in four unique worlds! Enjoy dozens of level types consisting of maze, tower defense, arcade and rogue-like schemes.
Use the extensive Level Editor to put your own scenario together! Take care of every single piece of grass, rock or acid lake to create the most surprising and weird map. Decide about the enemies - which kind, when and how many would appear, as well as achievements and bonuses to get or eat.
Gear up your cow with fancy clothes, horns and boots won or exchanged for milk after each level. Make yourself uniquely stylish and well prepared for the upcoming waves!
Chill on a couch with your friends and try to figure out the way to beat yet another level together or play the Championships mode to find out who's the best cow whisperer in multiple competitions!
Inform your kids that real cows don't use their poo to stun tractors, eat mechanical parts and equip bazookas to shoot down Aladdins.
Choose between campaign, championships or player-made scenarios to beat every possible enemy wave in four unique worlds! Enjoy dozens of level types consisting of maze, tower defense, arcade and rogue-like schemes. Use the extensive Level Editor to put your own scenario together! Take care of every single piece of grass, rock or acid lake to create the most surprising and weird map. Decide about the enemies - which kind, when and how many would appear, as well as achievements and bonuses to get or eat.Gear up your cow with fancy clothes, horns and boots won or exchanged for milk after each level. Make yourself uniquely stylish and well prepared for the upcoming waves!Chill on a couch with your friends and try to figure out the way to beat yet another level together or play the Championships mode to find out who's the best cow whisperer in multiple competitions!Disclaimer
Inform your kids that real cows don't use their poo to stun tractors, eat mechanical parts and equip bazookas to shoot down Aladdins.
What Steam players say
Recent verbatim reviews from Steam — separate from playze.io community reviews below.
I bought it when it came out and left it half abandoned, now I decided to play it again and there were many things that I missed, such as the utility of ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥, or using skills like farting, so in this second gameplay I configured the buttons properly and I think now I get to appreciate the game a little more, which by the way gets quite difficult. I recommend it especially when it's on sale. Still couldn't play it in Co op but I guess it will be much more funny. Here is a video with a few minutes of gameplay. https://youtu.be/QMUAeAzszDQ5 found this helpful
I cant fathom that you bastards didn't make a sequel to this game and instead decided to push you anti cow agenda. get back to your roots if you want a loyal fanbase. us holy cow milk fans were here from the start. Im tired of sticking up for you after all these years... Milkers unite2 found this helpful
HOLY COW! Milking Simulator, developed and published by Space Boat Studios, is a chaotic and wildly imaginative arcade experience that turns the humble act of milking into a full-blown survival spectacle. The premise alone sets the tone for the madness that follows: you take control of a cow whose life revolves around eating grass, producing milk, and staying alive in a world filled with danger, absurdity, and dark humor. What could have been a simple simulation quickly spirals into an unpredictable adventure packed with exploding obstacles, mechanical threats, and surreal settings that push the concept far beyond anything resembling normal farm life. It is equal parts parody, action game, and fever dream, a perfect storm of eccentricity that keeps you constantly on edge. The main goal of the game is deceptively simple—graze on the lush patches of grass scattered throughout each map, fill up your milk supply, and survive long enough to complete the level. The catch is that you are far from alone in these fields. Lawn mowers whir across your path, knives rain from the sky, sharks emerge from impossible places, and hazards pile up in increasingly absurd combinations. Each stage thro…2 found this helpful
This dev may be small, but this game is a HUGE amount of fun! This game was obviously made with a lot of love and care. It's silly, high quality, and all around wonderful. I hope the dev gets the recognition that they deserve! :) I LOVE MY COW! <3 To everyone reading this, please know that Jesus Christ loves you! You are precious and irreplaceable, and you matter! Take care. ^_^2 found this helpful
Very milky.2 found this helpful
Hillarious game full of silly humor. I have just started playing with my son and he couldn't stop laughing. Game is packed with clever challenges that really make you use your brain.2 found this helpful
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