The Dive

[h1] The Dive [/h1] [h3] Positives: [/h3] + Some sort of attempt to humour + The music and sounds are okay + Parts of the atmosphere + Acceptable voiceover/voiceacting + The puzzle + Its quite cheap to buy [h3] Negatives: [/h3] - Not much to see or do - Half of the game are "cutscenes" - Very simple design - Horrible gunplay - The encounters are just awfully executed - No options menu - You cant adjust anything (sounds, controls, graphics etc) - Stiff animations - Extremely short (all over in about 15 minutes) - The game should have been free [h3] Conclusion: [/h3] If you like quirky experiences where you dream about cutting your private parts off or getting eaten by a shark in the end, this is your game. If not, do something else. Paint your cat purple or think deeply about why you exist. Anyhow have a nice life! [h1] Total Score: 4/10 [/h1] [b] NB! There are some parts where you can get temporary stuck: [/b] 1. When trying to harpun the shark, aim slightly above its eyes (yes the gunplay is super fantastic) 2. When fighting the diver be sure to get a bit of distance to avoid getting hit yourself 3. In the last "boss fight" after picking up the red balls, swim to the sides o…

the ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ shark. don't ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ waste your 2 dollars on this ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥.

---{ Graphics }--- ☐ You forget what reality is ☐ Beautiful ☐ Good ☐ Decent ☑ Bad ☐ Don‘t look too long at it ☐ MS-DOS ---{ Gameplay }--- ☐ Very good ☐ Good ☐ It's just gameplay ☐ Mehh ☐ Watch paint dry instead ☑ Just don't ---{ Audio }--- ☐ Eargasm ☐ Very good ☐ Good ☐ Not too bad ☑ Bad ☐ I'm now deaf ---{ Audience }--- ☐ Kids ☐ Teens ☑ Adults ☐ Grandma ---{ PC Requirements }--- ☑ Check if you can run paint ☐ Potato ☐ Decent ☐ Fast ☐ Rich boi ☐ Ask NASA if they have a spare computer ---{ Game Size }--- ☑ Floppy Disk ☐ Old Fashioned ☐ Workable ☐ Big ☐ Will eat 10% of your 1TB hard drive ☐ You will want an entire hard drive to hold it ☐ You will need to invest in a black hole to hold all the data ---{ Difficulty }--- ☐ Just press 'W' ☐ Easy ☐ Easy to learn / Hard to master ☐ Significant brain usage ☐ Difficult ☑ Dark Souls ---{ Grind }--- ☑ Nothing to grind ☐ Only if u care about leaderboards/ranks ☐ Isn't necessary to progress ☐ Average grind level ☐ Too much grind ☐ You'll need a second life for grinding ---{ Story }--- ☐ No Story ☐ Some lore ☑ Average ☐ Good ☐ Lovely ☐ It'll replace your life ---{ Game Time }--- ☑ Long enough for a cup of coffee ☐ Short ☐ Average ☐ Long …

I don't know, really. This is an interesting one because it's both incredibly simple and a bit of a mess. With the exception of beating a man to death with a crow bar, every step in this game is a bit of a confusing hassle despite there being so few. From the difficulty in shooting the shark in the eyes to actually figuring out you have to move to and left click the final boss after a stun, there's a lot of unintuitive stuff here. However, the game isn't exactly long and I do dig the setting. There's also a dream sequence where you castrate yourself and... it's just weird. It's a lot, but at the same time barely anything. I spent $0.79 on this for like twenty minutes, most of which was me trying to figure out how to beat the boss. Is that a fair price? Maybe, but I suppose it's less than a soda.

it made me cut my wee wee off

Short underwater horror adventure a 10 out of 10 game.