The Procession to Calvary
Joe Richardson · 2020 · Dark Comedy, Medieval, Funny, Point & Click, Surreal
PC
Overwhelmingly Positive97% · 1,19778Metacritic
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Screenshots
About The Procession to Calvary
✦ AI summary
Hunt down the tyrant Heavenly Peter across a surreal Renaissance landscape made from classical paintings in this point-and-click adventure where you can solve puzzles the intended way or just murder everyone and skip ahead. It's a darkly comedic tale that blends Monty Python-style absurdist humor with gorgeous classical artwork and a soundtrack of masterworks by Bach and Vivaldi.
A time to love, and a time to hate; a time for war, and a time for \ -Ecclesiastes 3:8
Story
Huzzah! The holy war is over! Your oppressors have been vanquished, the churches of the Old God lay in ruin and thousands of innocent people have been murdered! But it's not all good news; the tyrant Heavenly Peter has escaped your clutches, and you have been tasked with the mission of finding him... Your journey will take you through a richly detailed landscape built from hundreds of different Renaissance paintings. You will steal a ship, feed a donkey, compete in a talent contest, assist an inept street magician, sing, dance, play the (magic?) flute, poke a man's face, hunt for treasure and have a chat with Our Lord God Almighty... But will you find Heavenly Peter? And if you do, how will you take your revenge!?Features
- Pointing and Clicking – A traditional point and click interface, with a 'verb coin' interaction menu and a simple inventory from which you can drag and drop your preciously hoarded items.
- Renaissance Artwork – Paintings by Rembrandt, Botticelli, Michelangelo and many more are brought together into one consistent world, in a way that is also as sympathetic as possible to the original works.
- Classical Music – a soundtrack selected to fit with the style of the artwork. Music from classical composers such as Vivaldi, Bach and George Frideric Handel will accompany you on your journey.
- Standalone Story – The Procession to Calvary is set in the same world as Four Last Things, but its story can be played independently.
- Optional Murder – You will be equipped with a sword. This will become useful in a number of different situations, but you will be strongly discouraged from using it on people. Ignoring this advice – and murdering anyone who stands in your way – will serve as a useful method of skipping any puzzles you don't like. But be warned; your actions might come back to haunt you...
- Nonsense – A style of humour reminiscent of the surreal, anarchic comedy of Monty Python. Lofty subject matter is treated with refreshing flippancy. Gags about butts are taken very seriously. But rest assured, while some of the jokes may be ridiculous, the puzzles make perfect sense! (or at least adhere to a consistent internal logic)
- Moments of Surprising Profundity – Actually, no... Don't read too much into it.
What Steam players say
Recent verbatim reviews from Steam — separate from playze.io community reviews below.
I played through this quite a while after playing the first one. I did like the first part (Four Last Things), but there was something I can't quite put my finger on, where I didn't find the game exciting enough to immediately pick up the second part. Maybe it is because I am now more used to the style of the game, or was in a different mindset when playing it, but I liked Procession To Calvary a lot more than I liked Four Last Things without having a real rationale for it. I think I found the game a lot more overally coherent, and I found the riddles both more intuitive and more creative than in the first game. Procession To Calvary still had the same edgy humour, but world felt even more outright silly, which made the tone feel a lot less jarring and a bit easier to grasp. I don't really know what else to say about these games, except for that I really like them and I hope this dev keeps making odd games like this
Super fun and kooky game! humorous and the puzzles are fun to do! :)
love the art realy good game
Terry Gilliam really outdid himself here.
Art and murder. 10/10
Very original style, technically really well done. The point and click game mechanics are less obscure than others and it's almost linear at times, although if you don't play it carefully you will experience the game only partially (I won't tell more not to spoiler) so you do have to work a little bit to resolve some of the puzzles. The humor and the dialogues are brilliant, you might just want to avoid if you are a fervent catholic and very sensitive because it pulls quite a few punches. But then, as the saying goes - a game for everybody is a game for nobody.
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